Predators visit Thanksgiving Tables
If I were a Predator when would I commit an unthinkable act? Of course, you are not a predator. You are a loving mother, father, sister or brother. You are looking forward to Thanksgiving. We all think of the food. Most people have forgotten about the stripping that took place where Whites confiscated land that did not belong to them. Most people are not remembering that Thanksgiving is celebrating rape. I define rape in my memoir Identity Crisis, Identity Christ Is: A Journey to Love as a violent destructive treatment. The dictionary continues that it is the violent, destructive, or abusive treatment of something such as: the rape of a beautiful stretch of countryside. Rape is to force someone into doing something that they do not want to do like, sex. It is also a stripping and this usually happens emotionally.
Unlike the current tradition of Thanksgiving which has Americans highly focused on driving the economies agriculture and meat industry, the truth is for many families, Thanksgiving is exactly like the ghost of its past. Many family members will feel disenfranchised by the coming together of their families. Many “black sheep” will have tears of disappointment, even though they can almost expect this outcome, it is still hard to swallow.
The forbidden conversations that silence a room will be the evoked presence that causes some family members to come and leave early. Others will pretend like nothing has ever happened to make the family feel disconnected. Child Sexual Abuse predators have statistically admitted to targeting children that they no, within family, friends etc. Predators are going not only where they can manipulate the child but the adults as well. Ninety percent of child sexual abuse takes place with children that are known by the predator.
This Thanksgiving I want you to think of ways to protect your child. You will be in homes with people who you know, and that you don’t know. Consider keeping your child close where you are able to see them. In addition, if you have intuition that something is not right, is usually is not. Be strong in your convictions and be willing to remove yourself and/or your child from a situation that makes you uncomfortable.
If you have been sexually abused by family members and you still possess the agony of the sexual abuse, I encourage you to be strong and confront the people who allowed it to happen, or be strong enough not to engage with the predator. You don’t have to pretend it did not happen for the sake of family. Use wisdom, and be calm in your approach. Choose to have a courageous conversation knowing that others may not be ready to reconnect, admit, identify or change any circumstances surrounding the dynamics of the families’ relationships. Have no expectations but know that you are amazing, and regardless of how you are treated, you are still amazing.
This Thanksgiving, do not bite your tongue stop pretending that everything is alright when you’re an emotional wreck. As much as we want to be loved, sometimes we don’t get to choose who loves us. God will allow you to be placed in the space of people who will love you as he does.
This is a process, and I want to hear your comments so that we can start a dialogue about the process. I talk a lot about my own experiences in my book found at: www.identitycrisisbook.com
I have begun my own personal journey to teach Ten Ways to Safeguard your Child from Sexual Abuse by invitation across the country.
Also, here is a blog that I wrote about Child Sexual Abuse and the church. 93% percent of predators are religious. We assume what predators look like and what they want. I encourage you to read this blog. (CLICK HERE)
FACEBOOK: Ten Ways to Safeguard your Child from Sexual Abuse