I keep my dick in my pants,
them hoes take it from me.
- a rap lyric from Lil’ Wayne’s documentary.
“Shocking Revelation” was the title that media take out used to reveal that Lil’ Wayne was a victim of child sexual abuse at eleven years old. The news broke initially in 2009 when Lil Wayne did a documentary that he later demanded be pulled from the shelves and sued the company for portraying his drug use as an addiction or “negatively.”
The admission starts at 13:57 where he says, “Twist, what you laughin’ at man? How you get that? You get that? You understood that? You sucking on clits over there? How old are you, Twist?” “Fifteen,” he responds. Lil’ Wayne continues, “You ain’t fuckin’ yet? You can hear in the background that there is a woman who is trying to defend Twist, or at least change the conversation. Of course, the men laugh because it has always been tolerated thought that a man becomes a man after his first piece of a**.
Lil’ Wayne continues his perpetrator speech,
“You better be now. On the real! I was fuckin’ at eleven. I had my daughter at fifteen, nigga. It ain’t cause you a male, it ain’t cause you fifteen- you supposed to do it because you are Young Money. You supposed to.”
He admits that he was raped beginning at 14:55 in the documentary.
“I was raped at eleven, Twist. I loved it. I ain’t never press charges.”
Watching this documentary made every cell in my body react; the hairs in unseen places stood up. I am motivated to write this blog because I fear that the majority of the 248,000 people who have viewed the below installment of the documentary are children who, will assume that Lil’ Wayne’s way of responding to his own rape, (to become a predator), is acceptable behavior. I am also concerned that youth will suppress their own sexual abuse, and silence their pains with sizzurp and weed as a copy cat of Lil’ Wayne.
Myth #1 – Lil’ Wayne was not sexually abused
Here is a comment from the Kollege Kidd website that posted an article on the same subject.
Yall Niggas over reaching with this bullshit. Wayne telling this nigga to be a man on sum real nigga shit. Yall acting like he telling 15 yr old girl to have sex. Two different situations.
In the community of unspoken male bonding, it is often perceived that the rights of passage for boys to become men is to give them a prostitute, an older woman to have sex with. Boys are praised while girls are degraded for sexual exploration or promiscuity. What we have found is overwhelming evidence that does not support this initiation into manhood as morally, spiritually or emotionally as correct.
(In the above video Vocalists, Producers, and Performers Neo and Chris Brown admit to having relationships with older women before their eighteenth birthday. It is common, it is cool.)
Boys who are forced by others to have sex are traumatized. Think about it for a moment. If you have something that is the most precious, priceless, most valuable “thing” in your possession, and someone strips you of your ability to choose to keep it, or give it away- would that choice not affect you later in life?
A boy’s virginity is not to be auctioned at the lowest possible opportunity while a woman’s virginity is viewed to be the only thing that makes her valuable at all. The thoughts of men are twisted and this is proven in the lives of the one in six men who identify themselves as victims of sexual abuse who are embattled with sleeping with many women or men, addictions to cover up pain, and/or mental illnesses like depression, post traumatic stress disorder, bi-polar, or schizophrenia for example.
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In his videos he toys with the fact that he was raped. I have watched his confession of rape in the VH1 interview and the documentary. Lil’ Wayne was sexually abused. He did not ask for or consent to sex, nor could he be responsible for such a decision at eleven years old. The young woman who put her mouth on his penis was fourteen, three years older than he at the time. By law, she was able to be prosecuted- but there is just one problem; she was forced to do it.
Imagine- you a young girl in a room full of grown men, and Lil’ Wayne. Bryan “Birdman” or “Baby” Williams, Wayne’s surrogate father degrading you in front of the rest of the room, and telling you to suck a boy’s penis! Where were her parents, or who was responsible for her in that room that chose not to protect her? Why was she in a room with so many men? She had a choice, to give in or fight. Both must have been scary for her, I would imagine.
Myth #2- That he loved it so it is no big deal
God made our sexuality to experience pleasure. When we are entangled in sexually immoral behavior, no one said that it would feel bad. According to the Christian faith, sex is supposed to be enjoyable, but there are scriptures written clearly about sexual morality.
Many victims of child sexual abuse, rape, incest, and molestation have said that they were confused by their abuse because he/she either groomed them to believe that what he/she was doing was acceptable or that it felt good. They did not want this to happen, it was a violation of their bodies but it confused them that it felt good.
When I was sexually abused at four years old, what he did to me did not hurt, it was not painful, not all of it. But that doesn’t mean that it was acceptable for him to commit such acts to a four-year old. Even if he were seven his acts would have been child sexual abuse. In my case, he was a grown man.
Myth #3- Because Lil’ Wayne did not press charges, Baby is off of the hook
When I hear “Baby”, Lil’ Wayne’s surrogate father speak, it does nothing for me, ever. I don’t want to pass judgment on a man who I have never met, but I have never been impressed with one interview, one quote, and I’ve never listened to one single sixteen bars on a track. Honestly!
People can come in your life and become titled improperly. For example, sometimes we call people our friend before time and tests can reveal who they really are to you. Lil’ Wayne needed a positive role model, a man of his word, and someone to show him how to become a man.
Baby, is my personal opinion was a business savvy man, that mentored Lil’ Wayne in his craft. He was not a father. What Baby and Lil’ Wayne have in common is music. If for some reason Lil’ Wayne had become a police officer, it is unlikely that “Baby” would have been such a significant figure in his life because he would not have needed to mentor him.
Baby is a business partner, mentor and they have a powerful father-son type of bond, according to their own admissions, but that doesn’t mean that his actions are one that a responsible, morally conscious father would put on his child.
A father does not take a fourteen year old girl in a room with the majority- grown men, and degrade her in front of them, and then order her to suck his son’s private parts. A father does not teach his son that the way to achieve manhood (at eleven) he must give up his identity, I mean virginity.
I am careful about how I share my thoughts about a father because there are many of us who have experienced some form of incest at the hand of a biological parent. As a result, Baby may be acting like your father or mother, and you think that the behavior is normal.
Baby was the consenting adult who forced two children to engage in oral sex, pressured by the co-signers that stood around, and each of them are responsible too, as accomplices. Currently there is legislation in Maryland to charge accomplices of child sexual abuse with misdemeanors.
What this means is if, whether you were present, or were aware of the situation and did not tell law enforcement, you could be charged with the crime. I hope within that legislation, law enforcement is equally responsible for handling complaints of incest, rape and child sexual abuse the same way citizens are expected to.
Lil’ Wayne’s statement that he did not press charges because it felt good is no different from someone who is not famous that questions whether they were a victim of abuse at all, because it felt good.
Myth #4 Lil’ Wayne is Gangsta
Lil’ Wayne is like every other workaholic we know. He is great, and has crossed over. The president referenced him as greatness. He is a real artist as he says. Even in recent years, because he was the only thing my ex use to listen to, I admired his play on words and realized how clever he is in his lyrical content. My ex would call him the “Clever Rapper.” I think he made that up too.
Let us define Gangsta shall we? Encarta Dictionary: English (North America) Edition says, a gangsta is a gang member, rap performer. (noun) As an adjective a gangsta is relating to or characteristic of urban street gangs, their activities, or gangsta rap.
Now, I’d like to use my own definition of gangsta because I happen to know a bit more than you would think I know about the subject.
Gangsta- Lawless; empty hearted. A gangsta is cold, and completely disconnected from emotion. Gangstas are not concerned with family; evil, separated from reality. Gangstas are homicidal. Gangstas are composed, and are the epitome of the phrase, “I’m not a killer but don’t push me.” Gangstas are also leaders. It doesn’t mean that their leadership is good, but they have strength and confidence that can be intimidating to followers. – Ressurrection Graves’ definition of Gangsta
A real gangsta is not one who just talks about his missions, and would never disclose his indiscretions with women, or murder to others on the street.
For some reason, people are attracted to such a hardened heart. Women often want to be the love interest of a gangsta to prove that they are important enough to shatter the walls that gangstas put up. A gangsta and a thug are two completely different things. Gangsta are extremely intelligent and usually run some kind of enterprise even if that enterprise is illegal.
For the modern-day, Gangstas are an image but I know and understand all-too-well that gangstas has a different kind of mindset. Lil’ Wayne is no gangsta. He pretends to have no feelings but in each interview, his expressions, and his answers reveal to me that he may numb his feelings with sizzurp and marijuana because the feelings indeed exist.
Lil’ Wayne is broken. By his own admission his mother was forced to live with him at his grandmother’s house. His biological father came every few days to beat his mother violently. He shot himself as a child, and again by his own admission was raped at eleven. Lil’ Wayne’s image is gangsta however I believe that he- given his ambitions is not. – Ressurrection Graves
Little Wayne has had a very traumatic life, in which he tries to de-victimize by stating that he is the best rapper alive. Look at that, I too can rhyme.
Myth #5 Lil’ Twist is not in danger
I do not understand for the life of me, why or how parents are comfortable with allowing others to raise their children. I am not sure why Lil’ Wayne was permitted to leave home and join Cash Money- to be raised by Bryan “Baby” Williams. And, I would like to clear something up, Bryan “Baby” Williams is not that much older than Wayne.
That is only relevant because of the whole fatherhood relationship that they seem to share. I have siblings with the same age difference as Wayne and Baby. Lil’ Twist is in danger. His perpetrator is Lil’ Wayne who made it very clear in his documentary that Lil’ Twist would be required to have sex because he is a part of Young Money.
In the music industry, and in Hollywood child sexual abuse, sodomy, child pornography, rape, incest and other sexual violence are swept under the rug because of the draw of income. Many people who are perpetrators are in positions of power, and have the ability to pay for a movie to be made or not. In this case, Baby is the CEO of a record label, and how he conducts himself is how those around him will follow, including Lil’ Wayne.
How do you feel about this article? If you are:
- A teenager who is struggling with your identity
- A teenager who wants to do right, and need to understand this article better
- A parent who would like to learn tips about how to talk to your children
- Anyone who desires to understand child sexual abuse and the affects better
- Anyone who has questions about the impact of the music industry
- Or anyone who has additional questions for me
I offer a 15 minute consultation. Any resources, support of information that I can provide to help you during our consultation is available to you by clicking here for more information.
Please comment. Begin a dialogue with me, so that I can answer your questions if you have them. Also, this situation may remind you of your own situations at home or school. You may know someone who is sexually abused by an adult or constantly pressured to have sex by peers. The constant peer pressure is not sexual abuse but you can uplift your neighbor and encourage them to remember how valuable they are. This is something that I instill in my teen-daughter daily.
Ressurrection Graves is a child sexual abuse expert and H.E.A.L.E.R.® who speaks on topics surrounding healthy relationships, overcoming homelessness, child sexual abuse prevention, adult healing, and awareness. Ressurrection is available for radio/television interviews, or ministry/conference/keynote speaking engagements nationwide by telephone at: 202.717.7377 (RESS) or please email: ressurrection dot wordpress at yahoo dot com.
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