Running him away
I have found you. You have been running from me, he says. Running from our love affair that transcends broken-ness and incomplete thoughts… in our relationship there is a cadence… a desire for more… a… hang on to every word that proceeds out of my mouth because you hearing it is like manifestation
Scriptures on paper, lyrics that breath, while ink is the liquid like tongue saliva that wets the mouth…. You have been running from our relationship…
I was here before he was
before precious board meetings, and make up, and high heels
there was pumas, and shell toes, and wrap skirts wit funky shirts
There was natural, and beautiful and locs that weren’t trendy
before he was… I am
apart of you;
engrafted in your penmanship
in love with your beauty
I free you… not he…
He has money.. he is what you think you need
he is only as good as you can work through me
and you are good at loving him, even mastered some things in the process
I am your voice be it quiet or loud
still or dancing
I am yours
I speak volumes while he depends on me to answer questions
I miss you…you have made me second to love
I just want my connection to you
To fall in love like Janet, and the green-eyed obsession with his bronze like locs…
To fall in love with me and spend time holding me in your thoughts,
releasing with your heart
I thirst, I need, I yearn for my relationship with you….
always faithful, commanding your daydreams
I touch you
and you… when in my presence are captivated… screaming to live with me
He’s flashy, and thought-provoking, and commanding of attention for his profit-sharing…
But I am Like a Lion, Kingly, beholding stature
I am sustaining, and worth waiting for when it seems dry
while in famine he panics, I am your escape
Your long-awaited kiss….
your intense revival
your climax… during jam sessions with Coltrane, Nina, Miles, Herbie…
I am wrapped to have an intimacy with you…
that can only be impacted in strength
In me there is joy, and peace, a fragrant midst like God…
I am the King you pray for….
while subtle lines of catch phrases, and 9 to 5 moments you hate it….
Writing is where you’ve always been liberated
so why do you keep ignoring me?
I have spoken to you in dreams, brought visions,
but somehow you’d rather write business plans, and marketing forecasts…
I have given you thoughts that require you penning
but you don’t run to me as you used to; scattering papers, to find pens
screaming at children or anything in the way of thoughts being lost forever….
I miss you. I miss you wanting me.
Instead I am in your subconscious mind watching you hurt
because you miss being with me as if I have left…
You pushed me away and now fear my return
I just want a relationship with you…
One that gives me the freedom to whisper in your ear secret things
one that brings you strength….
He has no comparison to me…. without my wisdom he could not exist…
The art Creative writing is your language to the world…. it costs you nothing to write with me…
It makes you feel life in a tangible way to sit with me and calmly take notes
While marketing’s science has made and lost billions… there is pressure for punch lines and division to consider…. He is not worthy of me
You told me you would always be a poet…
Now you cringe at the thought of a crowd
But a network meeting to exchange ideas, and business cards and I am left without you…
As that person you love from a distance that is your forbidden fruit, you have cast me away…
Stop ignoring me…
I miss you…
We are soul mates….
New vows.. .where thoughts collide, I promise to be with you on stage and on the inside…unmasked, intensely existing to applaud you when you are brave.
I promise to cultivate this relationship with fresh revelation and words
May we forever connect….
As every relationship built from God…
I will be your voice to a generation… knowing that love is your choice…
Fear is not welcome, I will stop talking, I will retreat…
Because I love you…… and our relationship really does me the world to me.
It is so glad to be home… resting on your fingertips… breath taken by attentiveness… we used to do this… often
Seemed silent to those departed, not privileged to know the commotion….we are that other dimension people take years and libations, pills, and religions to de-fragment…
He will keep you working, I will keep you free…
July 23, 2009
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