It was a chilling night. Hypothermia cold so it felt. The temperature was 43 degrees in my car. Back in 1999 when I aspired to be a full time poet, before people told me I would never make money doing that, I would fully engage in my work. Including, wanting to pretend to be a homeless man. In theory, the idea of laying out on the concrete as a homeless person would get me more in touch with nature and allow me to speak authentically on behalf of homeless men that I saw living this way. Now, I find myself involuntarily amidst the homeless fighting to keep my sanity, my strength and my body warm.
I wrote a poem after the Marvin Gaye hit “What’s Going On?” It came out of my observations on the famous U Street in NW Washington DC, and a particular drunk at the Kaffa House that we’d see on random poetry nights.
Tonight, I slept in the driver’s seat with a chocolate-covered blanket I got from the homeless shelter that they didn’t want to give out. Well they were donated for homeless people and should I not have it, I could freeze. I have no remorse for attempting to keep warm.
A night of rain, so it began and then cold came in. It tampered with my emotions, tears threatening to fall from my eyelids, but daydreaming different thoughts kept the water from gathering more.
I don’t know why my car was made this way, but the seat only goes back so far. Since everything that I own is in the backseat, I have limited lean. Tonight, I was surprisingly not fearful of my surroundings. Am I becoming comfortable with the idea of sleeping outside and immune to my condition?
What kept me up tonight was a fear of falling asleep with the car running. Certainly do not want to die from Carbon Monoxide poisoning. So I’d turn it on to heat up the car, and then turn it off hoping to fall asleep before cold’s grip would arrest me.
It didn’t matter much, it was so cold that I kept waking up every time I fell asleep. I even took two Nyquil to help. But this reality couldn’t even make me drowsy. I felt like I was taking placebos.
Morning came and, offered no supportive reality. Though the sun came out, I sit still in complete exhaustion as if I had not slept at all. It is interesting to me, the expectation that a person who is homeless must find a job first, work and then get a place to live. It sounds logical but homelessness is not logical at all. We are failing as people to expect a person who is homeless to function as if he is not indeed homeless.
Developing programs that support the mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health of a man, in order for them to have proper shelter, and shower so that he can feel both valuable and confident to speak with someone about a job is incredibly necessary.
I wear, the same clothes, from head-to-toe as yesterday. I hate being without a shower so trust me, I will find one, but as for my day, I look sleep deprived. I am not well-groomed, my clothes are soiled with yesterday’s dead skin that needs to be removed.
But I will, because I have to, show my face and look for jobs though I can barely see. I will press through this. I don’t know how. My closest friends and I are out-of-answers. These are my Adventures in Homelessness.
Compassion isn’t compassion unless you do something. When Jesus had compassion he changed atmospheres, healed the sick, raised the dead, and ultimately he changed situations for the better. I often say that Love is an Action Word, and in my opinion, so is compassion. Your response to pain, lack, and sickness is an action.
I have come up with very simple ways that if you could share this post, or contact me for services, my fourteen-year-old and I would be out of harm’s way, and cold’s claw. I have limited marketing dollars. Actually, I have none so I’ve resourcefully whipped up some informational pages here on this blog site like The Ressurrection Experience or Business Makeover Takeover.
I love the Buy Me Lunch page, which simply offers you the opportunity to glean business strategies, and expertise from me for $50. As the title suggests, you would only be responsible for paying for the meal, and the $50. That is a steal!
Check out my pages, and pass on this blog. My daughter and I are resilient, we are creatively offering hotels my massage services in exchange for room and board. I have in the past paid rent by providing massage to a couple. I have offered business services as well. Either I need clients, or shelter, take your pick.
If you like this article, the only way that you can show your support is by letting as many people of influence know that you can by posting the link on social media profiles, sending to your business organizations who can disseminate my links to business professionals in need of my services, and if applicable use the services for yourself. I solicit your assistance in getting me out of the car and into an apartment with my daughter.
Thank you for your help.
At your service,