I was walking through the grocery store the other day and because I was really day dreaming as I thought about chocolate, I don’t remember if I was talking to and accompanied by my mom or my daughter. Either way, the statements that I am going to share with you are not new to them, but the revelation behind those statements are even new to me.
When I was younger, my mother was selected to be in a newspaper article and I was away at camp. She went on with the article without asking them to postpone the pictures until I got back from summer camp. Like everything else, she assumed it was no big deal that I was excluded from this but the article was about me as well. So why did my sister stand in my absence? Who knows but it was just another happening that made me feel unloved.
The irony of the pic was that it made it look as if my sister was apart of our little family when at the time I couldn’t remember the last time I had seen her. She did not live at home.
My mom keeps saying to me that she doesn’t understand why I didn’t talk to her, but its clear to me that she doesn’t get that she wasn’t emotionally there. Eventually we will break through this wall. Nevertheless, since this book has come out, even more has surfaced with me in my own healing process.
What does this have to do with Chocolate? Well, I’ve probably said a million times before that this woman from Switzerland who found us after reading the article decided to be my friend.
Occasionally she would write me directly from Switzerland and promise to bring me authentic chocolate after I revealed that despite my mom’s long list of fans for her desserts, if it wasn’t chocolate, I could easily avoid the family fights.
She lived on Yoakum Pkwy, her building was close enough to see the juvenile jail in Alexandria, Virginia.
She would bring me chocolate, and write me checks for $35 or $50 to help me with school clothes or shoes.
I felt loved. She thought of me, for no particular reason. She connected with me and she could have done what 50,000 other people did when they read the article; read it with the morning coffee and recycle it, or use it to protect their dishes as they moved.
I was sad when she moved on. I think she went back to Switzerland because of her mom. But, I never forgot her. She showed me love and kindness for no other reason than her own compelling spirit. She even called a few times from Switzerland to check on me.
What a great person! My memories of chocolate are associated with happiness. Maybe that’s why my boyfriends use to always notice that I dance when I have chocolate in my hand.
I thought this was an interesting discovery and wanted to share my chocolate day dreams with you. Think about yourself, what do u eat because it is associated with an emotion, spirit or experience that you have had. This is literally food for thought.