The answer to this titled question is also one of the Ten Ways to Safeguard your Child from Sexual Abuse, which is a series or teaching that I take with me to campuses, churches, ministry groups and collectives around the world to engage in prevention and awareness.
The media would have you to believe that Pastors, and Youth Coaches are the only child sexual abuse molesters and perpetrators.
However, I want to be clear that those Pastors, and Youth Coaches are uncles, cousins, fathers, friends of families, and often are known in the community in a positive way.
I’m writing this entry to disalarm you from thinking that you have to keep your children away from the pictures that you see on the 5 o’clock news, as if the descriptions, and representations in the media of child sexual abuse are common.
Some of you may believe that Pastor Eddie Long is a child sexual abuser. I know that Pastor Creflo Dollar said, that ex- New Birth members who were thinking of joining his church should go back! Clearly in support of his “brother” and “friend in the Lord”, I think we can all agree that Creflo Dollar has lost the respect of many church-goers, including me.
Bishop TD Jakes said “We have no other authority but to pray,” said the prominent megachurch pastor before he took the stage at McDonald’s Gospelfest event Saturday in Newark, N.J.” according to Christian Post.
You would never believe that your own pastor would commit sexual abuse right? Neither did the members of New Birth Baptist Church, the church that Eddie Long Shepherds.
After the child sexual abuse scandal with Eddie Long, I lost complete taste for church. I still enjoy worship and I love God, but I’ve been on a hiatus from the sanctuary because of the consistency of fallen leaders regardless of religion or denomination. I didn’t arrive at this place on purpose, my mind and my heart collected piles of foolishness and when it began breaking, I knew a time out was in order.
While Eddie Long, and Jerry Sandusky were a mainstay in American news television for 2011, I assure you that your children should be protected from people who are close to you.
You remember the statistics from The bible and child sexual abuse blog, right?
The ironic thing about television is that they normally only feature child sexual abuse from the standpoint of a female teacher sleeping with a younger student, a coach or pastor molesting a child. I have personally never seen other highlights like the producers of Hollywood movies who rape children and make jokes between each other about the sexcapades with these children.
On the news, you never hear about a friend of the family, Uncles, Aunts, or incestuous relationships, that are often only played out in African American movies.
Predators are people who hunt you, and your children to make friendship and establish a connection, who volunteer to be alone with your children to violate them.
In massage therapy school, I was told to use “Universal Precautions“, and that is what I will leave with you today. I was taught in school that in using Universal Precautions, I would not assume which clients had a contagious disease, or herpes, HIV or AIDS. I was taught to use precautions that would protect me whenever I worked on any client. For some, that meant gloves, for some it was constant hand washing.
There are specific precautions however that we all used universally. If someone was bleeding due to a menstrual period or if semen had gotten on the sheets because someone was unable to hold their composure during the massage, we were told to throw away the sheets immediately and disinfect the bed.
Universal precautions is a term I’d like for us as parents, educators, social workers, therapists, and human beings alike to align ourselves with as it relates to child sexual abuse.
Family and Friends
Treat your family and friends, male and female, as you would a stranger. Many teachings like “stranger danger” and “good touch bad touch” focus their campaigns on ten percent of the market. Predators don’t want to be a stranger, and they don’t want you to think that you’ve experienced bad touch. If you wouldn’t leave this child with the person if they were a stranger, then you definitely shouldn’t leave them if they are familiar.
Take a moment to check out:
For additional statistical information the above blog shares plenty. Remember to follow your spirit, your intuition and disallow your child to be placed in a position to which they can become violated by a perpetrator. This applies to any situation including holiday parties, and family functions.
- Did Tyler Perry pressure the victim from Penn State to testify in his Open Letter? (ressurrection.wordpress.com)
- Would you marry someone if you knew they would be or are diagnosed with a disease? (ressurrection.wordpress.com)
- Eddie Long’s Wife filed for Divorce (ressurrection.wordpress.com)