Sometimes you can hear a song for years and it sound magnificent as if the God of Heaven came down and wrote it for himself. There are some songs that in its simplicity arrests the very resistance that you possess on the inside of you. It is like looking into a mirror without knowing what a mirror actually is. Babies often have this look that I describe, they see themselves in mirrors with astonishment knowing that they are looking at a wonder, a miracle; their own self.
The last few days have been frustrating and it shows. I have written a dynamic blog and in that blog one of the final things that I say is that your relationship with your mate is ministry. To be exact, and quote myself:
“Such commitment cannot by any means be taken lightly. Marriage was never intended to end in divorce and if you are fortunate enough to be considering marriage for the first time around, it is very important that you be true and honest with yourself first about who you are and what your needs may be.
Self-examination will help you to become a better person in weak areas, and will help you to figure out what your life long needs are in a multitude of intimate relationships that you will develop from here on out.
Marriage does don’t make one of you lose yourself for the other. You keep your individual thoughts, beliefs, gifts, and existence and you merge into one beautiful being spiritually, emotionally and physically. To be honest with you, being married is the most selfless thing that you can ever do.
Having children can even be a selfish act, but being married will expose you to yourself, and your accountability partner, your mate. Marriage is a ministry and I pray that this blog has in some way aided you in putting dating with purpose, engagement and marriage in proper perspective. Pastor Cynthia Brazelton says it absolutely best,
“The way you treat your mate should be a tangible expression of your relationship with GOD.” “\
My husband-to-be is peaceful; a peace maker. He has beautiful character; always calm. He is resilient and has his own testimony that makes him profoundly made just for me. As stress began to build this week, and I feel trapped by business and google searches, pressures to turn my personal work into book sales and financial sustainability while planning a wedding, and oh yes, being a mother of a teenager among other things, I just wanted time with God.
I wanted to sneak off and disappear for an affair with my love; the greatest of all. At some point, all the ideas in the world cannot compare to that sweet gentle whispering answer. Sometimes you just need to remind yourself that there is a greater power who protects you, supports you and seeks to do you good.
I love my family but I feel like I’m under a pile of football players on the field during an “attempted to fumble me” play. I wasn’t the nicest person today. I know something about my love, he doesn’t like women with nasty attitudes, at all. It is a pet peeve. I must admit, I’ve been bittersweet the last few days, and he because we are so close notices everything. He’s challenged my behavior and tonight when I was going to pray about him “getting on my nerves” God corrected me. Ha!
He is right. Where is poised, peace filled, loving Ressurrection? She’s being tainted by her environment, and that is not acceptable for a leader. Having a mate and a child can be powerful character indicators that help you to continue to develop.
I know me, and a few things that make me respond cranky. The main one is not having enough time to spend with God. I miss my time. It is not a result of anything bad, I have felt overwhelmed and haven’t watched my time spent toward other things. By the end of the night I’m exhausted and frustrated. I haven’t slept well in weeks, I don’t have access to the space that I feel I need to effectively spend time with him.
Maybe I’m talking to someone in cyberspace who can understand. I have been in church for more than thirty years, and now that I am not with a church home, there are aspects of service that I miss, not enough to go back, but absolutely enough that I must create an energy around it in my home. In other words, although we do pray and always talk about the word, study and solve problems using the word of God, there is nothing like falling in love with worship experience.
For those of you who understand and appreciate worship, the nakedness and vulnerability of it, that my friend is what has me ready to tear the head off of the next person who is mean to me. Not a great excuse! Give me Jesus or Give me a Sword! I’m exaggerating, you hope!
As I craved this song today, although it took me hours to find it on You Tube because I could not remember the words or the vocalist, or even the title, “Love Came Down,” there was a spiritual pull to connect with God in a way that only one can do comfortably, alone. There is nothing wrong with folks running around the church as if they just stepped on hot coal, I’m just not a runner, except that one time!
As the song came on, it felt like Love (God) came down and my heart began to hear the lyrics in a way that was deaf before. It wasn’t that I did not hear the song before today, it just did not have the same impact because I was not in this place.
I don’t care what religion or faith you are attached to, people often call on God in situations that seem beyond human reasoning or resolution. But when you cultivate a relationship with God, that same sense of desperation for connection will present itself when you’ve been away from his presence for too long. You will begin to crave meditation; your spirit will cry if your eyes won’t swell.
TIME VS. QUALITY TIME
Remember the quote from Pastor Cynthia Brazelton above when I say this next part of my experience. All week, I have felt like my husband-to-be and I have spent time together, but when I talk to him about it he hasn’t differentiated between time and quality time.
I’m not alone in desiring time, God wants our attention as well. I always spend time with God because he is always present. I pray all day during times when I feel compelled to do so for something specific or nothing at all. However God wants his quality time too. And time is what you spend together doing nothing in particular. Quality Time is unique and important to a relationship’s success.
Quality Time is dedicated energy; intimacy and focus on involving yourself in things that require you to put down telephones, and other distractions. Time is when the children are awake and you all are at home. Quality Time is when you get a babysitter, or when they are sleep.
People will be who they are, my husband-to-be is right. Regardless of how people treat me, I must continue to be an example of light to change my environment. In order for me to remember that, I have to answer when God calls. I cannot overwhelm myself. God is not impressed with stress.
“If my heart is overwhelmed and I cannot hear your voice, I’ll hold on to what is true though I cannot see. If the storms of life they come, and the road ahead gets deep, I will lift these hands in faith, I will believe. I’ll remind myself of all that you’ve done, and the life I have because of your son. Love came down and rescued me, Love came down and set me free, I am yours, I am forever yours….” – Brian Johnson, Bethel Singing, “Love Came Down”
You Are Welcome,
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