An eighth grade student in Wingate, New Mexico was kicked out of school, and after re-entering were made a mockery of via public announcement of her pregnancy. The Bureau of Indian Affairs have received phone calls from press, and based on the video below her mother is involved. I first saw this post through World Star Hip Hop’s Video.
I remember fifteen well, it was the birth of my one and only child. I too, was kicked out of school and put into a “pregnancy school” for expectant and new teenage mothers. The idea was to remove us from the larger population so that there would not be an outbreak. Instead, if they had more effort in promoting higher education and future career options like college tours and other positive education opportunities, youth would be more inclined to visualize goals.
I was fifteen in the tenth grade so this young lady has a unique situation. I am not sure if there school starts in later years or if there is an age difference between the young lady and other class mates.
Isolating teenagers only make them feel even more under-served. By contrast, T.C. Williams High School, the same high school that Remember the Titans, a movie starring Denzel Washington was based on, has a daycare center for teenage parents’ children. I have mixed feelings about a daycare center on campus, and I was a teenage mother.
Having children will change your entire life. It is not a decision to be made in the heat of passion, or with warm fuzzy feelings of emotional love. When you choose to have children, you should consider important things that you want to accomplish in life like:
- Social Life
As a teenager, you are still trying to figure out what to major in college, where to go and how you are getting there! I did not believe in abortion so I had my child. I believed that if I was irresponsible enough to lay down then I would be responsible enough to respond to my actions with leadership and strength. It may not make sense to some but I love my daughter. In spite of all of the amazing feelings I have toward my daughter, I do not advocate teen pregnancy.
However, if you are a teen mom I do advocate teen parenting. This is a crucial time, never give up! Parenting is a gift from God. A child chose to come through you, and while it will be hard, there will be reward for your ability to adapt and be flexible in learning how to manage your own childhood needs, and be a selfless, considerate parent for this gift that you have received.
Three things I leave with Teen Parents:
- Hold Your Head Up: Be Shameless – It happened, and guess what? You are not the only one in the world who has sinned or made a misstep in judgment. It is not how you fall but how you rise.
- Be A Parent- Do not abandon your duties because you are a child raising a child. Seek support from family. Adults need breaks just as teenage parents do. This is a time where you will have to read some books, learn quickly and make adjustments. Do not feel bad about taking a break responsibly.
- Believe In Yourself – In the bible Mary was like twelve and a half when she was pregnant with Jesus. She was just as surprised as you are. Just because she had an immaculate conception and you had sex, won’t change motherhood responsibilities. You are getting a crash course of how life will treat you in ten years anyway. People will always tell you how to feel.
Notice that my tips were left for Teen Parents. In the case of the Eighth grader, her boyfriend or father of the child was not disclosed. He was not present for the interview and he was not embarrassed at the school (if he attends this school). Many times, the negative views of teen pregnancy, sexual relationships, and promiscuity are weighed on young women when, young men need to stand up as well and honor their family.
Even if the father is not with the mother he can be a full time support by doing the following:
- Buy diapers without someone asking you.
- Come and spend time with the child (pick them up an take them with you if appropriate)
- Walk the child to school or drop them off at daycare
- Read the child a book, Make up a song, Teach them a word or two
- Read books on Fatherhood and Be proactive in Parenting
Lastly, at no time should a school system turn an entire class of students away from one person for fear that the person will make pregnancy seem cool. Instead you could counteract this behavior with positive reinforcements, like a hike in learning and information sharing that goes a little deeper than the surface.
By engaging in this kind of behavior you are not preventing other students from getting pregnant, you are preventing them for communicating when they are. They will run to get abortions for fear of shame, when they should not be given such pressure between life and human opinion.
Love is the Answer.