Did you know that perpetrators find my blogs too? They have computers, jobs, and families. Predators are not only online but they are Hollywood Producers, and unfortunately often someone’s mother or father, sister or brother, wife or husband.
In The Bible and Child Sexual Abuse I my focus was to touch on the subject of what we as a body of Christians can do to eradicate the epidemic. One in four girls, and one in six boys will have experienced child sexual abuse in their life time. Ninety-Three percent of perpetrators of child sexual abuse are religious.
What this means is that could be your pastor, the Sunday school teacher, the man or woman who offers to walk your child to the bathroom, the usher or other church member. What this also means is that the improper thinking that you have found a great person to marry because they are religious or spiritual has become obsolete. We have to ask for what we really want, but that is a completely other blog that I wrote about how to ask for that experience. I have made that blog available here.
In this text, I will bring some clarity to the location where sexual morality in the bible is approached, who talked about it, and why. I will also talk about the history in the text and hope to resolve any conflicts that you may have with the ideas associated with child sexual abuse and God’s intent to dismiss or confront the issue.
Disclaimer: I am a Christian. Not all of my work is dedicated to such depth in scriptural exploration however, I respond to the need in front of me. There are people hurting who want to use the bible as a tool and standard for living. This blog is going to share in the Christian faith what God’s standard is from a non-denominational perspective. Non-Denominational Christians are just that- we believe that it is not about living a life conformed to religiosity at all, but one with regard to faith.
This teaching is not designed to offend you and is sensitive in nature because we are talking about sexual morality. I welcome your appropriate comments. We will look at both old and new testament. Lastly, what I will share is not about my personal opinion. On the matter, I don’t really have a personal opinion, I side with the text. And, for clarity – having an opinion on homosexuality does not make you a part of hate speech or homophobic. It is okay for us to disagree as long as we love.
There are 6.9 Million Christians globally in our world. Many of them turn to their computer to google the bible and child sexual abuse. They want to know how to handle child sexual abuse in the church or with their personal religious and spiritual views. This information is for the population of Christians and for the spiritually abused to know that their is a way out of your turmoils and that what happened to you is not your fault, I don’t care what God you acknowledge or serve.
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“Lust has no conscious!” – Pastor Joyce Meyers
Child Molestation is improper touching, fondling, groping of a child. Sodomy is anal penetration, a form of rape. Rape and Sexual Assault are terms used to describe when someone penetrates your vagina or anus without consent to sex. There are other terms that have surfaced over the years like Sexual Violence which relate to any violent or violating acts of non-consensual penetration.
We will give a full background to the text introduced. So, we will talk briefly about homosexuality, fornication and adultery and then child sexual abuse.
God does speak on the matter though it is often not spoken of in churches. Many churches talk about sexual morality as it relates to fornication and homosexuality, but they do not delve into child sexual abuse. For this reason, I will briefly address fornication and homosexuality and then the subject matter of child sexual abuse.
FORNICATION AND HOMOSEXUALITY
I am not a beat around the bush kind of woman so let’s confront what you may find uncomfortable in the text (if this may apply to you), before moving on. Many churches have homosexual pastors like B. Slade formerly known as Tonex’ whose parents left him their flock when they went to be with the lord.
B. Slade, means just that he says, when you come into who we’ve known as Tonex’s presence you will be slayed! He’s referring to the power of the Holy Ghost. He is rebranding his image to, in my personal opinion a more flamboyant, secular and public interest with his homosexuality. On You Tube, there is a video of him standing atop a bar singing and jirating (while a man yells in the background) into the splits during his performance of “Freak U Good.”
Many Christians are torn by this. I saw it coming I am not surprised by his new platform. There are many current homosexual gospel artists that I can mention, but I will not for the sake of staying on topic of this post. The question is, Is homosexuality a sin? By the scriptures the answer is a resounding yes. According to scriptures, we were all born into sin. That means that we were all born with something that we must overcome. A responder on one of his video interviews said it this way,
“You were born gay, I was born an angry, spiteful, lying, vindictive fornicator… we need to stop treating homosexuality as some special sin. Jesus Overcame That Sin Just Like The Rest!!! So the issue is not how we were born – we were ALL born in sin – it’s about whether we choose to use the power God’s provided to NOT act on our fallen desires and whether or not we allow him to process us into wholeness….”
efreddyfusion 1 week ago 6
And then there is Tye Tribbett whose music we all adore. He and his group have broken up, and he is redesigning his brand, after a brush with adultery a while back. I also saw this coming. I am not judging either of these men but I want to make clear that according to the bible and the code of conduct for sexual morality, there is no difference between the sin of homosexuality, fornication, and child sexual abuse. The requirement for holiness is the same. God takes sexual morality extremely serious and he requires that we live a life that is composed, humble, and yes morally satisfying to him.
I am proud of Tye Tribbett for how he has turned his “fornication” or adultery into a testimony to help other couples to live a life of fidelity, free from selfishness and lust.
I will talk about this more in depth in a moment but what makes Tye Tribbett different from Eddie Long is repentance. There actions may not have been the same, but the process for dealing with sin is.
By now, you want proof. You want to know where in the bible other than Sodom and Gomorrah it states that homosexuality is not morally correct behavior. And, that is fine. I chose to deal with the Monkey in the room because the text about all sexual morality including child sexual abuse are in the same chapter in Leviticus.
In order to say that child sexual abuse is sexually immoral behavior, you would have to also acknowledge that the bible does not ignore fornication and homosexuality. The church remains silent on the matter of child sexual abuse just as the family does.
My cause, and position is not to teach for or against homosexuality but I understand that those questions may arise because of the sensitivity in the information that I am providing.
Instead my focus and my life is dedicated to empowering others to prevent and overcome child sexual abuse. I think Joel Olsteen did a phenominal job on answering Oprah’s question about his biblical view of homosexuality.
Below we will examine where in the scriptures child sexual abuse is spoken about, how God desires us to handle a discovery, and the process to forgiveness.
ARE ABOMINATION AND SIN INTERCHANGEABLE
I had a friend who is homosexual. She is a Christian, and entrepreneur so we have much in common. She is a member of the Pastor’s Care Ministry at her church that holds service exclusively for homosexual Christians. She would always bring up biblical speech to me as if she were trying to find a way to seem right in my eyes.
She has been in a homosexual relationship for years. She first introduced me to Leviticus 18 because of the scripture. She presented the argument that the bible does not refer to homosexuality as a sin rather an abomination. I love my friend, and quite honestly I miss her terribly but she was more concerned about her lifestyle than I am. She will never change my mind or belief that homosexuality is a sin, but that doesn’t mean that I judged her for her actions.
All of us have areas in our lives that we must examine, and change. But, it struck me as odd that she was so interested in trying to “get into heaven,” especially if she is comfortable with her lifestyle choice. Where she spends eternity is really not for me to judge, it is between her and God.
She said, that abomination is not sin so she will still go to heaven. You see, her desire is not to repent (to turn away from) homosexuality, she wants to marry her long time girlfriend and wears a beautiful diamond engagement ring I might add.
My job is not to determine if sexually immoral people will go to heaven or hell, and that certainly isn’t the main topic here. However, I want to clarify abomination. As I mentioned to her, if the text on sexual immorality says that it is an abomination to god which is “something that God hates”, and not a sin (which is something that God also hates), why would you want to do anything that someone you love, hates?
Let me be more clear. She is right it is an abomination to commit acts of homosexuality, fornication, bestiality, and child sexual abuse. The scripture is specific in Leviticus 18. An abomination is something is detestable to God. Why would you want to do something that he hates?
It is important to show you that there is indeed a difference between abomination and sin. I want to focus more on what steps should be taken once you have found a perpetrator of child sexual abuse so I am going to reference a source that I found about the difference between abomination and sin HERE for your personal study and meditation.
Here are some definitions that will help you, that I have borrowed from the link above.
The Greek word for sin is HARMATRIA or HARMARTANO. The meaning is “to be without a share in; to miss the mark; to err, be mistaken; to miss or wander from the path of uprightness and honour, to do or go wrong; to wander from the law of God, and to violate God’s law”.
“The Hebrew word for sin is CHATA and means “to miss the way, to err, to miss the mark, to wander from the way, to become unclean”. Another Hebrew word used for sin is PESHA and means“transgression and rebellion”. It refers to those who rebel against God’s intended way in their lives.”
“As we consider the word for abomination in the New Testament, it is the Greek word BDELUSSO or BDELUGMA and means “to abhor, a foul thing, a detestable thing, to stink, smell bad, odious, wickedness, and to turn one’s self away from on account of the stench”. In the Old Testament there is more than one word used for abomination. The main word used is TOWEBAH and means “a disgusting thing, a thing of wickedness”.
THE BIBLE AND CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE
Are you still wondering what God has to say about Child Sexual Abuse? In Leviticus 18, in the second book of the bible located in the old testament Moses was told by god to convey to the Israelites that they would not be able to bring their mess with them (see verse 2). In verse 4 the Lord tells Moses that “You shall do My ordinances and keep My statutes and walk in them. I am the Lord your God.”
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As the chapter continues there are references to sexually immoral incestuous relationships, and relationships with family by marriage, neighbors, and same sex. In the verses of Chapter 18 bestiality was prohibited as well.
In the latter verses of the book on sexual morality, it says this:
Leviticus 18:24-30 Amplified Bible (AMP)
24Do not defile yourselves in any of these ways, for in all these things the nations are defiled which I am casting out before you.
25And the land is defiled; therefore I visit the iniquity of it upon it, and the land itself vomits out her inhabitants.
26So you shall keep My statutes and My ordinances and shall not commit any of these abominations, neither the native-born nor any stranger who sojourns among you,27For all these abominations have the men of the land done who were before you, and the land is defiled–
28[Do none of these things] lest the land spew you out when you defile it as it spewed out the nation that was before you.
29Whoever commits any of these abominations shall be cut off from among [his] people.
30So keep My charge: do not practice any of these abominable customs which were practiced before you and defile yourselves by them. I am the Lord your God.
THE CEREMONIAL, CIVIL AND MORAL LAWS OF LEVITICUS
Please remember that I am not God. I am sharing information based on the word of God, and the subject that we speak of is sensitive in nature. Most churches don’t talk about it, because they do not want to deal with it.
Church until recent years have been a male dominated society, and while matters of abuse are significant, many perpetrators are in pulpits *cough* Eddie Long. Darrell Gilyard was the pastor of a church in Jacksonville Florida. He was found guilty of sexting, and rape. He was involved with more than one incident in that church. He served three years, and upon release went down the street to begin to preach at a new church location. He is a convicted sexual offender.
Not that I by any means agree with Bishop Paul S. Morton’s (the person who ordained Eddie Long into ministry), ill responsiveness to Eddie Long’s silence to repentance on the matter of his child sexual abuse, but some are still dispassionate about Long’s removal because he is not convicted. What is the excuse of those in Gilyard’s camp?
I have more respect for Bishop Paul S. Morton Sr. for his open rebuke as I believe it shows his commitment to christian character, but enough time has passed, and Eddie Long has been unwilling come to repentance.
Bishop Paul S. Morton is in a position to take his rebuke further and to disassociate himself with Eddie Long’s ministry as a result of his sexual misconduct with New Birth members.
So, how do you handle child sexual abuse scandals in the church? Whether it is a leader or not Leviticus is a relevant body of scripture. I found an amazing explanation from someone on Yahoo Answers! I am going to quote his answer here:
“Many Christians are perplexed when they confront the issue of the Mosaic Law. How binding is the Law on the Christian? Some have said that Jesus abolished the Law of Moses. I would have to disagree, based on the following passage spoken by Jesus Himself: Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil. (Matthew 5:17)
Some have suggested that by “fulfil,” Jesus meant “abolish.” Indeed, “abolish” is one meaning of “fulfil,” but it is also the only meaning of “destroy.” So if He had meant “abolish,” He might as well have said, “I am not come to abolish, but to abolish.” We can assume, therefore, that Jesus meant, “to develop the full potentialities of” when He said “fulfil.”So why then do Christians not observe the Mosaic Law?
The answer is that they do observe parts, but not all of it. Some parts of the Law were meant to be temporary, while others were intended to be permanent. This is seen in the fact that before Moses, the ancient Jews were not bound to the ritual commands (except circumcision).
If the Mosaic Law was not meant to be temporary, then either God changes or the God of the righteous men and women before Moses was a different god. But this is absurd. We know that the God of Abraham was the God of Moses, and that He is our God today. The coming of Christ made parts of the Mosaic law unnecessary.
In order to understand this, we must realize that the Law is made up of three parts: ceremonial, civil, and moral.The ceremonial law related specifically to Israel’s worship. Since its primary purpose was to point to the coming Savior, Jesus made it unnecessary. He did not abolish it, in the sense of destroying it; He fulfilled it. Nowhere do we read that Jesus thought that the ceremonial law was wrong.
The principles behind the ceremonial law are still applicable to us today, that is, the principles of worshipping and serving a holy God.The civil law prescribed rules for the Israelites’ daily living. These laws separated the Jews from the Gentiles, and gave the Gentiles the example of how a holy people should live.
Since much was given to the Jews, much was expected. But God gave a new covenant in Christ, and there is now no distinction to be made between Jew and Gentile. We are still to follow the requirements of this law as God’s people, but the punishments are not for any nation to impose on its people, because we are no longer separated by nations but by God’s grace (Christians and non-Christians).The moral law is basically the Ten Commandments.
We are still bound by these laws, not for salvation, but to live a holy life. Jesus not only desired that His followers adhere to these commandments, He wished that they would go above and beyond them. He said, “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment: but I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment…”
He desired not only an outward observance of these laws, but an inward observance as well.So we see that the parts of the Law that have been rendered obsolete are those that contain ordinances. An ordinance is either a memorial of something that has already passed or a type of something in the future. The Old Testament laws containing ordinances were not meant to be permanent. There are no ordinances in the Ten Commandment Law.Now, we must remember that following rules and regulations will not get us into heaven. It is only through the blood of Jesus that we can see heaven. But if we love Him, we will keep His commandments. (6 years ago) according to Yahoo, and Written by: William Z“
QUESTIONS ABOUT CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE IN THE CHURCH
I have presented much clarity for the backdrop to answer the following questions
- How do I forgive my child molester?
- How should a pastor handle child sexual abuse in the church?
- Does God forgive Child Molesters?
- Is Child Sexual Abuse in the bible?
- Does God love child abusers?
- What does the bible say about having sex with family members?
- Where does it say that I can not have sex with a child?
- How do I handle if I caught my husband molesting our child?
- Can I take a child molester to court?
Are you surprised? Remember I said that ninety-three percent of predators are religious. They want the same answers that you want. It doesn’t mean perpetrators will use the information to change but they do want to at least know if it is in there.
Currently there are no known cures for child molesters, child sexual abusers, pedophiles or rapists. Psychologically, and scientifically this kind of life style is viewed with the same eyes as addiction. In twelve step programs all over the country, they believe that you always have the disease and can relapse at any time. As Christians, yes we are optimistic and believe that any one is entitled to second chances. We also believe that God can heal anyone, at anytime, anywhere, and however he wants to. With child sexual abuse however, statistics showed that rehabilitation is not an option for perpetrators, they re-offend within fifteen years some studies show. There is a case history that shows that registered sexual offenders should be extricated from their communities and for good reason, your children could be their prey. Because of the level of manipulation and child sexual abuse grooming to which they are committed to developing with you and your children, how will you know if they are cured. This may be too risky.
Disclaimer: Unfortunately not all registered sexual offenders are actually guilty of their conviction. Similar to murder, and other types of crimes where attorneys have come up with how they will or will not defend a client, many people in today’s society are convicted of things that they did not actually do.
Regardless of whether the sexual offender is convicted or not, if you are in absolute knowledge of this perpetrator offending, and you leave your child with them, or stay with them because you don’t want to leave, you are putting your family in grave danger. It is irresponsible and in many states, illegal. The only thing required to know that a sexual offender is in fact an offender is that someone has shared that information with you, like your child.
A recent study by our federal government confirm that it costs us $124 Billion dollars over the lifetime of victims of child sexual abuse due to mental illness, physical and psychologically related costs. It is a health crisis alone. The Catholic Church in an article published in 2007 stated that they have given out $2 Billion dollars to victims of child sexual abuse. This money could have been used to support children in education, impoverished places, and provided additional support to the community, instead benevolence funds are being used to settle child sexual abuse cases out of court.
The above video is a great example of how spiritual abuse and child sexual abuse are used to psychologically imprison victims. The church of Scientology is also a great example for the below explanation of what the bible suggests about taking someone to court. Scientology has their own court system within the realm of their religion. As you will see in this informative video, the church of Scientology does not acknowledge child sexual abuse to be a real issue.
DO NOT TAKE CHRISTIANS TO COURT
This is one of the most unexplained and poorly used sayings in the Christian faith, in my personal opinion. No one knows what it means but they hear it on the street instead of reading it in the bible. It is kind of like me telling you to never go to New York because something bad will happen to you, and you having confidence in me decide to do no internal investigation or seek god, but believe my opinion. We are all ministers of the gospel, and God requires us all to have a one on one relationship with him so that we can know his ways, and to know how to respond in situations. This is why it is crucial to know the bible for yourself.
So, get your bible and come with me for a moment. In Leviticus 19: 17 the bible essentially says to Love your brother, but rebuke him as necessary. in verses 15-18 he requires us to judge a case righteously based on the merits of the situation.
Christians have a higher godly standard of living and should be able to address life situations with wisdom and integrity. The text that I am sharing with you (Matthew 18:15-17) is not saying that we should NOT take others who are not Christians to court either. This chapter is speaking about spiritual authority and power. The text challenges us to use our own spirit to make righteous decisions that will resolve conflicts.
HOW TO HANDLE ANY MATTER WITHIN THE CHURCH
King James Version (KJV)
15Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.
- Go to Your Brother and Tell Him his Fault.
- Take One or Two People with You.
- Tell the Church
- Openly Rebuke Him
I caution you to do research on this subject. God is not a God of confusion. His desire is not that we would gossip, or backbite in our relationships. The reason that he says to take it to your brother is in hopes that they are mature enough to admit their faults. These are not just faults that you don’t like, and in this case we will use the example of child sexual abuse which causes physical, emotional and psychological damage to victims.
Further, if the person will not acknowledge their faults, you get two people who walk in love, and that can go with you to talk to the person. They are not going to tell them that you are right, and that they are wrong. They are approaching the person out of love to support them in overcoming whatever it is they have done wrong, providing that they are willing to acknowledge it.
When it goes before the church, it is an open rebuke and a warning to others of the persons conduct so that the church members would beware of such actions, like child sexual abuse. And finally, if the pastor has prayed about it, and the severity of the situation requires it because it could stumble or harm other members of the Christian community, they are to be expelled. See Luke 18 again for the reference to sexual immorality.
Paul was a Tent Maker, and Missionary Apostle. During the time that Jesus shared with us (Matthew 18) how we should handle church disputes, it was because Paul had observed that as a Christian Community who has been called to a higher level of contemplation and action of christian conduct, we should be able to handle our issues without involving the world. The government during that time sanctioned a Christian Court. This would be a court that allowed clergy men to judge a matter. It wasn’t that Christians did not take Christians to court. Christians had their own court system to judge themselves. In other words, instead of these millions and billions of dollars that are going out of the church in settlement, if the priests, and preachers were caught before the climax they should have been immediately reprimanded and taken out of their position of leadership, as an option for punishment.
THE PRESENT DAY CHURCH AND CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE
We do not have a separate Christian Court where pastors judge conflicts. We say we do, but we don’t. Many pastors, and clergymen ignore very serious issues, and not follow the bible as it pertains to handling church disputes. When a person in the church takes another person’s money to do a fake investment, believers are told to just pray for them and walk in love. The same is required of adultery and other forms of Christian misconduct. I am not saying all churches do this, but many.
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Currently Pastors are not mandated reporters. There are still religious freedoms which support clergymen being active in judging the conflicts of their congregations and making decisions about misconduct. However, in the case of child sexual abuse, many of the perpetrators are in leadership, and this method is not working.
As a body we must stand up, and demand the mantel of leaders who commit acts of sexual immorality if they have not repented and turned away from their wicked ways. I can’t for the life of me understand how Jamal Bryant and other leaders including the Pentecostal, Baptist, and Catholic Churches are able to stay in their positions of power without answering to what they have done. Actions can not be swept under the rug.
TAKING IT TO COURT
Finally, the bible does not indicate that you can not as a Christian take someone who is, or is not a Christian to court. The bible says that the dispute should be able to be handled outside of court because of your spiritual sophistication, but there are exceptions. If you call the police because you or your child have been a victim of sexual violence, you are not wrong, or sinfully unrighteous. You use wisdom.
Paul advised the church of Corinth to avoid giving an unbeliever the right to judge situations between believers, Paul was not saying that Christians should not take Christians to Court, they had a court system for believers only.
Your pastor may not be required to immediately report a predator. He can choose to pray with him and work with his sickness believing God for healing however, if he persists in ignoring the situation, your pastor may not be in right standing with God because of the clear guidelines for mishandling abuse.
The reference for taking someone to court is in the following scriptures:
1 Corinthians 6:1-7
When one of you has a dispute with another believer, how dare you file a lawsuit and ask a secular court to decide the matter instead of taking it to other believers! Don’t you realize that someday we believers will judge the world? And since you are going to judge the world, can’t you decide even these little things among yourselves? Don’t you realize that we will judge angels? So you should surely be able to resolve ordinary disputes in this life. If you have legal disputes about such matters, why go to outside judges who are not respected by the church? I am saying this to shame you. Isn’t there anyone in all the church who is wise enough to decide these issues? But instead, one believer sues another—right in front of unbelievers!
Even to have such lawsuits with one another is a defeat for you. Why not just accept the injustice and leave it at that? Why not let yourselves be cheated? Instead, you yourselves are the ones who do wrong and cheat even your fellow believers. (NLT)
And here is a great reference for the above scripture and discussion. Click Here.
The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Administration for Children and Families Administration on Children, Youth and Families Children’s Bureau has this to say about offenders who are not reported by people are aware of the situation:
Approximately 47 States, the District of Columbia, American
Samoa, Guam, the Northern Mariana Islands, and the Virgin
Islands impose penalties on mandatory reporters who knowingly
or willfully fail to make a report when they suspect that a child
is being abused or neglected.
Failure to report is classified
as a misdemeanor in 39 States and American Samoa, Guam,
and the Virgin Islands.
In Arizona, Florida, and Minnesota,
misdemeanors are upgraded to felonies for failure to report
more serious situations, while in Illinois and Guam, second or
subsequent violations are classified as felonies.
Twenty States and the District of Columbia, Guam, the Northern
Mariana Islands, and the Virgin Islands specify in the reporting
laws the penalties for failure to report.
Upon conviction, a
mandated reporter who fails to report can face jail terms ranging
from 10 days to 5 years or fines ranging from $100 to $5,000. In
seven States and American Samoa, in addition to any criminal
penalties, the reporter may be civilly liable for any damages
caused by the failure to report.
As Christians, we are called to forgive. We are also called to walk in love, but walking in love does not constitute being walked over. You can forgive those things that are behind you without forgetting that the assailant is still capable of hurting others. Ultimately, reporting your abuser is a personal choice and you will not get pushed from me, but as a protector, a parent, a member of a church body, we should all respond with alarm and urgency when a child reports that they have been touched, groomed, sodomized, or sexually abused in some way. Keeping silent about Sexual Violence is unacceptable.
Mandated Reporters are not limited to social workers, and those who work around children. This includes individuals who are citizens that are keeping the secret of abuse at home, or in the family. There are continued efforts to charge individuals who allow abuse to take place without reporting it. We are all responsible for our children. $124 Billion in responsibility.
Ressurrection Graves is a licensed minister, child sexual abuse educator and H.E.A.L.E.R. She supports victims of domestic and sexual violence in their healing, and teaches child sexual abuse prevention to churches, and mandated reporters. She is a regular radio guest and speaker who can be reached at: ressurrection dot wordpress at yahoo dot com. To check out her speaking topics, please click here.
SUBSCRIBE —> www.ressurrection.wordpress.com
First Published: February 18, 2012 at 17:55